12 JUICY TIPS ON HOW TO HAVE YOUR MARRIAGE WORK

 

The married life is far better than the unmarried life if you ask me. Having a companion to help you in life cannot be overemphasized. This is the reality. 

God never allowed Adam to be alone, and that was the more reason he gave Eve to him, not only to be a helpmate but a companion. 

There is a level of age you get to in life; you know it is time to be married; otherwise, you keep on living in sexual sins.

Now making our marriage work for those who have married is paramount. Let say you are Adam, and Eve walked away because both of you choose to stay or live apart then a lot have happened already even if you fail to think about it or feel bothered about it. 

Firstly you lost a companion and secondly, your helpmate is gone. You are now left alone and lonely. The impact of this loneliness on your life will certainly be unbearable no matter how hard you try to conceal the reality. The word of God says, ‘He who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favour from God.’

When you are joined together as husband and wife in marriage by a priest or pastor, the journey as a married couple begins and this time no third party is tolerated, your focus now is for a happy married life and nothing less.

There are few things I need to tell you at this junction on how you can make your marriage work, enough of divorce and all the naughtiness of life and abuse of marriage some couples put up out there by making marriage life look like a piece of rag and not a sacred matrimony singles out there should indulge in. 

I really don’t believe this, because I have been married for more than ten years now and I discovered there are basic secrets in a marriage that can help you stay on happily in your marriage and not the other way round by struggling or hating everything about it. 

And I will gladly love to share these useful tips with you on how to make your marriage work in a world of uncertainty.

 

It would be best if you continued the life you had during your relationship.

 

  This is one big area couples miss it. They feel they have married already and all the attraction that once pulled them together before they got married, they keep aside. They felt it isn’t necessary, and they pick up another kind of lifestyle in the marriage that does not fit the way they started out or before they got married. The ingredients, the juice, the admiration and all that, were completely thrown away because they now believe that marriage life is another life and a more serious affair. Honestly, that is false, and this is one big factor strangulating and killing the very essence of marriages today. 

The woman who once takes good care of her hair, her appearance suddenly becomes less important, especially when the kids start coming in. The man starts looking unkempt, his figure or shape start fading out, and he thinks his wife still love that look on him. 

You must keep your look intact just the way you both got attracted to each other. This is a sacrifice but a must if the relationship must be kept going, this time, the marriage relationship. 

If you eat out sometimes before marriage, it does not stop you visit recreational centres don’t stop either. I mean the fun part of your life, you must keep it going. The only thing you can push aside is what both of you agreed is not necessary. Listen, what is not necessary must be agreed upon by both of you to be put aside. Not doing some of these things can easily set cracks on the foundation of the marriage unknowingly. This happens when one of the couple or both starts seeing changes he or she never likes and starts admiring it on someone else out there and that is the beginning of a decline in a once vibrant relationship. The man or the women now start seeing things she loves outside her matrimonial home and all that. This is how it starts, caution must not be thrown into the wind or else, tension will emerge within, and separation may not be far away.

 

The ingredient of love, trust, faithfulness and submission must always be applied.

 

  If you want your marriage to work, the fire of love must be kept on. The romance must not be thrown away, no not at all. The way you want your love life to be is all up to you. You must trust each other, and you must leave a life of trust and not suspicion. Some couples do that a lot. When you start thinking your partner is cheating on you is the genesis of a suspicious living, and that will ultimately be denied you peace. When peace is lost, your respect for your partner dwindles, and the once kindled love starts drying up and if not quickly restored by talking about it. I mean your fears, suspicious, thoughts and what probably you heard outside from friends and all that, a broken home is never too far. There must be love for one another, trust must be there, and the bond of faithfulness must never be destroyed. Wives should submit to their spouse and their spouse in return, both must act maturely and hold unto the responsibilities that would be for the overall interest of the family. There can always be a matrimonial crack when spouses are not talking; you must talk about everything to be sure the ship is stable and not drowning.

 

 

Prayer      

 

  The family that prays together stays together. Prayer is key to stay on in the marriage. Marriage is a powerful union, and Satan never wants to exist. Because it is only in marriage, you can never be called an immoral, an adulterer and all that. Satan wants to keep you in sin, and the only way is to fight your union and watch you seek sex outside your matrimonial home, and that’s sin and sin is separation from God. Prayer can do a lot to frustrate the plots of the enemy against your marriage; therefore, prayer must never be ignored.

 

Watchfulness

 

  You must be vigilant always. If for example, your spouse has single friends of the opposite sex in her work you must take interest and read the handwriting on the wall ensuring such friendship will never lead to a crake in the marriage. It often starts as a mustard seed, but when it grows, it is more than enough to break the home. Having single ladies as friends is not completely bad or wrong, but it is obvious they don’t see things the way you do. This is marriage and not being alone or searching, everything is different now. I have seen broken homes caused by unmarried friends, I mean friends you kept after you got married, but they have remained single. Your marriage can go down if you don’t watch it.

 

About friends, family members 

 

  Friends and family member that will contribute positively to the development of your family should be tolerated; otherwise, friends or family members may contribute to the fall of a once-happy family. This is a significant point that mustn’t be ignored. 

Most marriages have hit the rock because the third party was tolerated, and that was unfortunate. Couples should therefore build a solid foundation against negative third party intrusion.

 

Issue of divorce must not be entertained. 

 

  There must not be compared with people who have failed in their marriages, but the focus should be made rather on successful marriages and determination to make your marriage work. Remembered you got married to stay married and not the opposite. Focus on the positives and not the negatives; raise your kids well by having a good training plan and all that, instead of dwelling on hearsay about persons divorcing. Marriage is death do us part and not this divorce madness some spouse get involved in these days.

 

When the kids start coming

 

  The kids must surely come, but if it doesn’t come early as expected, the family must stay focus and expectant without any blames throwing. And when the kids start coming, a good foundation must be built to ensure the kids are useful not only to the family but the society.

  

Build a good relationship with your kids

  

  Teach them quickly the ways of life don’t let them learn it outside, or they might learn the wrong things. Be their first teacher and never say you don’t have time for them. Always have time for them, manage their foolishness and make them realize their wrongs and help them know rights things in life. 

Teach them how to be helpful to the family and carried them along, give them responsibilities and watch them carry it out. What you make out of them today is what they will deliver tomorrow.

Your positive input on them today will certainly make over 95% of their output tomorrow. Train them early and watch their developmental strides in joy.

 

Work hard for the family. 

 

  Both spouses must work hard for the family. Either spouse must not be jobless or doing nothing to move the family forward. I mean if there is to be financial progress that brings about a peaceful home, both couple must do something to help the family progress.

 I have seen cases where men allow their wives to take a leading role in financing the demand of the home and the men to sit back and watch, that’s not fair. Work and enjoy the nicest things of life—this help in bonding the family and ease stress, evil thoughts and more. 

You don’t need to be employed by anybody, employ yourself and bring in the money. Do all it takes to ensure you take responsibility and earn your spouse respect. Turn your passion into creativity and be professional about it, you must make money to move the family forward, and when it comes from both couple, it makes it easier.

 

 Avoid Addiction

 

  Addiction doesn’t come overnight, you must watch it, or it might just be the key factor that will ruin your marriage. For example, alcohol, smoking, staying out late into the night, hanging with friends that are
not married or are never responsible can be a wrong move in setting your marriage on fire. 

You must know your spouse friends and what they are capable of doing, if they will not contribute positively to your marriage cut them off immediately. 

Now when either spouse gets addicted, he or she must never be ignored or it might just cause a possible decline and eventual break up of the marriage. Nib it on the board before any addiction that never existed before the marriage starts cropping up, kill it fast before it takes hold. At this stage, both spouses must be vigilant to do the needful before it becomes too difficult to handle.

 

Recognizing each other weaknesses and strengths

 

  You must know your partner weakness and strength to give the necessary help and not to take undue advantage of it or make comparison with other spouses out there. You must help out in the house chores, especially when you realize every time she does this alone and most times finds it difficult to engage or discharge her sexual role to her full capacity. 

Some men get angry about this but fail to realize that their wives are merely helping mate, but not house helps. 

The man, on the other hand, may not be good at saving money. Still, your wife is good, and you know this, let her help before the marriage runs into a financial mess and create loopholes for many other unwarranted issues that may start defiling the trust base of the family and all that. 

There are many instances to give here but what is needful is that we must help our spouses in their weakness so that both of you should reap the positive benefit of marriage.

 

Keep your shape and fitness.

 

  Some men or women don’t care about this at all. They just kept on piling so must fat in their body after marriage, and their appearance suffers for this negligence. 

Now for the women, your spouse may not say anything, but inside of him, he is not happy you are putting on all the fat. It makes you look different, obviously. Some men keep mute and start searching or admiring other single ladies outside, and this is a punch on marriages. As they say, one thing leads to another, that’s where obviously troubles start brewing on the home front. And for the wives they don’t like you putting on that pot belly, watch the food you eat and keep the fat away, or you grow ugly, old and less attractive before your spouse. This can create a vacuum for temptation you must watch it and always ask your spouse if he or she likes the way you look and when you get a no, you must do something about it, it is that simple. 

Both spouses can regularly work on their physical appearances and keep it attractive as always. This keeps the love, the romance going and obviously the marriage life, lasting.

 

 

  In conclusion, therefore, you must both keep your family together. This must be a collective and determine effort. Nobody out there will do that for you. Most of the world is actually watching you fail, but God is watching and helping you to succeed. Therefore, you must not only give God a place in your family but allow him to rule the affairs of your family in deep love and affection.