9 DATING TIPS THAT CANNOT BE IGNORED

Sex is not dating, and dating is not all about sex! 

Dating is all about building up a good relationship with someone of the opposite sex you are not familiar with yet for the sole purpose of getting married at a future date.

Dating today in our digital world, unfortunately, is seen differently, and many regret ever getting involved. 

Those days our Parents choose for us or play a role for us on who to marry, but today things have changed, and the search on who to marry is now left in the hands of the singles, and I believe strongly, they know it is never an easy task. 

Most singles make a lot of mistake in selecting their spouse because their selection pattern is based on any external factors like worldliness, beauty, wealth and other irrelevant related worldly factors. 

 

 

 The new age we are today allows social media as an option to smart dating, which many singles of diverse culture and background all over the world have taken advantage. However, the big question is this, is social media rightly an option to satisfy our dating needs or just an avenue to connect to real people you will never meet personally in real life? Many say they meet their spouse through social media, and other says their experiences were never pleasant and that it is all a scam. 

Whether social media or not, I would love to reveal to you nine eyes opening dating tips that you cannot possibly ignore in getting your compatible future spouse. These tips are not in any particular order.

Do you want to get married? Do you want to change your status from single to married? Do you want to put on the ring? Then you have to pull up a chair and read carefully.

 

 

WHAT’S YOUR PERSONAL MAKEUP? 

 

Who really are you or your kind of person? You should know who you are and what you want in life. What virtues do you possess and you want to see in another person. What good characters do you have and wished or want to see the other person you love to date possesses? 

You know today, some persons want to see their date possess some incredible virtues they don’t have, and they think such a relationship will work. It won’t.

Take, for example, you hate smoking or immorality, and you intend having a date with a person of this kind. Such relationship won’t work because you might get irritated in-between the relationship and call it a quit either before the relationship which is far better or eventually in the marriage that will certainly end up in divorce which is sad and heartbreaking. You must get the right person with your kind of personality, search for him or her and make the right choice, the right decision.

What you are and want to see in another person out there is what I call compatibility; this allows for understanding and a possible good relationship. Therefore for a date to be right, looking for your kind of person out there is crucial.

 

WHAT DO YOU WANT OUT OF DATING? 

 

What exactly do you want out of dating is important to know right from the start. 

If you are less than eighteen years of age, I strongly advise you don’t even start dating at all because over 80% of such relationships end up in a sexual mess like heartbreaks most leading to suicides, unwanted babies, mental disorders of various degrees, abortions, drug abuse and even birth complications leading to death. The females are always at the receiving end here. You must watch it or destroy your life. Therefore if you are less than eighteen I advice, you don’t date. 

However, I strongly suggest you read to learn so that when you eventually get to eighteen, and you are ready, you are knowledgeable already.

Now let’s proceed for those above eighteen. What exactly do you want out of dating? It would help if you were exact about it or else it is obvious you don’t know what you want. Is it casual sex, is it money, is it faking to have a date, is it the beauty of the looks, is it the fun of a distance naughty affair through emails, chatting and unending phone calls or the fun you derive especially on social media. What is it about exactly? To me, dating is not about wasting your precious time; it is about settling down with the right person pretty soon. 

What anyone should really want out of any date is a marriage which is a legal union between a man and woman to become husband and wife. Now, outside this, the concept of dating won’t be right because it will all be submerged in sexual sins and meaningless relationship. 

So why start when you don’t know what direction you are heading? 

Marriage is the ultimate for any true and sincere dating. Therefore, knowing this right from the start as your target is also crucial. It helps to guide you from eventual pitfalls.

 

GET TO MEET THE PERSON. 

 

This is an essential aspect too. You must meet the person. I mean your date. You may have meant on social media and all that, but you must arrange to meet each other. 

There are cases where the persons involved in such online dating are impostor, fake, and you never can know if you don’t meet the person. Make the dating brief while you fight hard to arrange a meet with the person you have a crush on. 

Caution; don’t ever send money or anything to a date you haven’t meant in person or you will be surprised it will soon become all a scam, beware. Now when you eventually meet, is the person your type in terms of appearance and all that? You are choosing for God sake, so you must make it well at the start or else you may want to admire someone else after you say I do to this person.

You must be satisfied with your date and if you are not, look for someone else, don’t enter any relationship or tie yourself down with one while looking elsewhere for another. 

Be careful before entering any relationship, and if you are not satisfied, quit instantly and move on. 

And in a case you can’t arrange a meet as I was discussing earlier it is a sign that the person may not be interested, don’t waste time move on and never be thrilled by any love talk and all that from an unserious date. 

Be serious, be vigilant, otherwise if you take the wrong step in error you might just be singing a divorce song pretty soon when others who got it so right from the start are rejoicing in their marriages. Get it right from the start, that’s my counsel.

 

Now let go on without wasting time.

And if the person is real, you must not meet in a secret hostel or place. It must be in an open place to know each other better and never for intimacy through sex. Sex must not be involved, or else you will never know the person; sex is a mystery. It has the initial potentials of covering secrets that you would have known right from the start, so to avoid pitfalls have some decent sense of control. 

You get to meet the person, see him or her talk, reflect on your date value system, moral worth and many more you want to know about your date. 

This will eventually arm you to take the decisive decision on whether to go on with dating the person or not. You shouldn’t waste time on this; if the person is not right, it will never be right when you get married.

 

 

NO ROMANCE OR SEX

 

Don’t you ever enter a relationship because of romance, sex or whatever wrong names it is called, dating is not about sex? It is about knowing your partner before deciding on getting married or not. Young adults get fascinated when it comes to talking about sex; they also feel that without indulging such dating is never complete. They say you must know your date sex strength, style and competence in bed and all that, and some even want to know the size of the penis, breast size, booty and all that stuff. Well, to me, these are only outward. Still, the inward is more important, and that is what will eventually determine the sweetness, flavour and taste of any true relationship that undoubtedly will end up in a marriage that will last.

You don’t get into sex with your date and think you can know everything about him or her, impossible. As I said before, sex covers a multitude of secrets; it will never allow you to know your date quickly to make the right decision or judgement. Stay out of it, don’t count it all fun, count it as a potential risk, got it?

This is what sex will do to you. It will imprison you in such a relationship and make you full of jealousy and contempt, especially when you see your date with another person you don’t know around him or her. You become a sex addict, and that’s one stupid sickness I have ever seen. It comes with selfishness and craziness. The time you ought to be married, you still see yourself neck-deep in a blinded relationship leading you nowhere. And you won’t be focused, and you will lose your mind, you will also think you got all the time and most cases you see yourself spending years in a directionless relationship that will keep others wondering especially your family members, wondering what the hell is going on with you.

Caution; don’t get into sex when dating, this will help you know the person better, and that would enable you to make the right decision quickly whether or not to settle down with him or her. Sex can wait, it has a right time, and that is after marriage. Many who had it during dating never had it as should during their married life because they never got to know their date too well, so when cheating starts, sex starvation crawls in, signalling an eventual break in the relationship. Got it?

I am sure you do.

 

 

KNOW THE PEOPLE AROUND YOUR DATE 

 

You must get to know the people around your date. This is important. Do other men flirt around her or ladies flirt around him, and for what reasons? Once it is obvious, it is for intimacy, quit immediately. That relationship will never benefit you because he or she has other persons in life that will definitely contend with you. You don’t need contention at this time of your life, applied wisdom and quit. Don’t let him or her tell you coated lies or you regret it tomorrow once you believe it. 

You need to know him or his family; this is vital also. Are they nice? Are they accommodating? Do they love you for their son or daughter? Are they humble, are they willing to help you get along when you eventually get into the family? When you get yes in all your findings or research, it is safe to continue the relationship otherwise quit. Again, the person must be God-fearing, if he or she is not that, it simply means he got no conscious. Anyone with no conscience can do anything to hurt the other, so you better check this early before leaping. Check for virtues, character and the fear of God, important. When you are satisfied, it is safe to go on with the relationship. I mean that’s a green light.

 

LIKES AND DISLIKES OF YOUR DATE  

 

You must also know the likes and dislike of your date. If he or she likes what you don’t like or dislike what you like, then you have to think seriously about that. Honestly, there is certainly going to be some problem with time when you eventually decide to be married. Candidly it is better not to continue with such a relationship. Other prompting questions are, does he want to get married? Does he love to have kids? And other normal lives issues and if you find out that the answers are not straight forward, beware. It would be best if you quit immediately rather than thinking things would change with time, that’s false, it will never. That’s why I warned don’t you ever have sex with a date you are still investigating or trying to know for compatibility; otherwise, sex will blind you and systematically lure you into a marriage you never wanted or will regret tomorrow.

 

 

            

COMPATIBILITY & TOLERANCE 

 

Check for tolerance, humility and unselfishness, these look like virtues, but it looks more than that to me. Take for instance you can’t touch the phone of your date or listen to him, or she make private calls or conversations then you must beware because it is a red sign that there is a lover somewhere. Thinking he or she may love you more is foolish. As long as there is somebody in the shadows, whatever time or years you have spent with your date is useless because you would be chased out like a dog. It is safe to check for all these before leaping. Does he possesses a good temperament, is he caring for real and not faking it. You must know all this or else your relationship will definitely land in trouble waters. The earlier you figure these out, safer for you to know where precisely you are heading to in your relationship.

 

 

PERSONAL HABITS & HEALTH HISTORY 

 

You have to know the history of your date. This is important. Where is he or she from, state, country? You have to know the parents and what they do for a living also. You have to know what your date does for a living. You have to know about his personal life history. Has he or she been in a date before? What happened? Was there a breakup and all that is there an active ex somewhere that may want to return in case you decided to have a go with your date? Does your date have health challenges you can cope with, are there habits you cannot tolerate? Was there an affair somewhere before leading to a child or more? Ask around where your date lived before, does he or she has a good testimony or good report? You got to know about your date from behind the scene, or it would be too late when you finally say I do.

Now if you check all these and find out, you cannot fit in then reverse the car and drive away. It is that easy, especially when you have not put any commitment, made promises or allow sex to becloud your sense of decision making. When you check all these, and it comes out good, meaning you can safely go in, that’s progress and a huge step in the right direction.

 

 

SERIOUSNESS OF THE PERSON 

 

The seriousness of the person you are dating is fundamental. Some person never wants to get married they only try to when they feel they are getting older and that to me is deceptive to their date who may be eager to settle down immediately. Some will tell you; I am not sure if I will get married soon, want to remain single for a while and all that. 

Now, while they stay single, they keep on having sex and leaving the life of the married. Most times waste the time of the females, who don’t need to be delayed in getting married. Some young men are fun of this; they tell you they are searching even when they see the right lady, the same goes for some females too. They are not serious. 

I tell you this if you are a young man or young lady don’t ever be entangled with such an unserious person, it will lead you nowhere. The time you ought to be in the company of your own grown-up kids, you will be thinking of how to get started.

Now, it is also good to play with time as you try to see if there is an intruder into your relationship and rumours about anything unpleasant. Be absolutely vigilant. This is about your life and a happy future.

 

 On a final note, You may want to agree with me that getting a date on social media may not be a bad idea after all, but you must meet the person in real life to start any meaningful relationship that would eventually snowball into knowing yourselves; otherwise, you may just be making a mockery of yourself, and such relationships may never see the daylight, beware and apply caution.

 

Please share this article around to help the singles community worldwide, thank you!